The day after I stopped being beeleaf I went for a walk in the woods. The weather had been foul, really windy and wet. I was doing the usual route with Willow and I noticed this bedraggled bee... on a leaf...
*Ahem*...
The bee was completely still with his back to me as I approached to look closer. I crouched down to get a good look and to, of course, take some pictures. As I got down he turned around and started to make his way, a bit clumsily, towards me. Every now and then he would get up on his hind legs and wave his fore legs at me. As if he wanted to climb up. I didn't let him of course, so he kept coming towards me, walking slowly, across the plant he was on. Until I stood up and walked a little way away. The he just turned around and walked back to where he had been on the plant originally.
Now I know that he had just sensed a tall thing that would get him higher or a warm thing that would dry him quicker. That's not my point.
My point is that it triggered in me a very powerful experience. It was like watching a massive analogy unfolding in front of me. I felt such love for this little (but actually quite big!) bee and a lot of gratitude and if I could I would have swept it up in my arms and loved & cared for it forever. However... it was a bee! So I didn't do that! But I have swept up and carried away the experience and I am still grateful for it!
Was it a sign??
Was it just a cold, wet bee tired after a hard day working in the wind?
Not sure it matters.
One question though.. have I done the right thing in walking away from beeleaf? Should I have kept beeleaf and Heart and Soil separate??
hen
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Nature has a way of giving us messages if we listen and look - as you have proved you do. I hope it all works out for you.
ReplyDeleteOnly you can say. :-)
ReplyDelete(However, if I click on any of the photos on the bottoms of your posts that say "you may like these stories" I get a screen that says the beeleaf entry does not exist. Did you delete the old blog?)
:) thank you xxx
ReplyDeleteI've mended it now! Forgot to update it after the name change!! :)
Hmm, I believe in signs.
ReplyDeletemaybe you could be 'beeleaf in heart and soil'
or 'Heart, Soil and Beeleaf'
Leanne x
Life is about change. And when those changes are significant, they need to be given their own name.
ReplyDeleteIt looks like the little (big) bee walked over and gave you his blessing.
And (maybe) waved goodbye.
I can't answer your question...but i can tell you my experience...which was that as soon as I had two blogs I felt paralysed and couldn't post to either! The seperate parts of myself are wound up together so intrinsically that it didn't work trying to separate them. However, I knew the orginal name and concept wasn't working either, so took the plunge and changed everything so that it was one place, but where I shed the less useful bits.
ReplyDeleteXX *hugs*
I would have liked to see what the bee wanted and let her crawl up my arm :)
ReplyDeleteAs to your change in name I think you are right in what you do. Beeleaf had a purpose for you and now you are changing your life to help and educate others. Changing your blog name is part of this recognition of new beginnings. Just my humble opinion of course as I don´t fully know the background of your decision.
Also, I´m keen to learn willow weaving for gardens so I´d be very interested in what you´re up to :)
Z
Dear Hen,
ReplyDeleteEvery time I read one of your posts I feel so much better about humans. You put a smile on my face and hope in my heart each time. I agree with Barry...I too think he was giving you his blessing and waving goodbye. Go forward and be happy!
Your friend across the pond,
Janet
I cannot improve on everyone else's comments are there are some great ones. The new blog looks lovely and it's reflecting the changes that you've gone through and the journey you will be taking. Good luck with it all and the shops look good too :)
ReplyDeleteTake care
Kim x
Wow. Thank you for you responses to this. I do see it as a sign and I'm processing what it means to me during my meditations.
ReplyDeleteThank you :o)
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